I mentioned before, but on Monday the 14th, I went into hospital that morning to feed Talmage and to see when discharge would take place. I didn't get to talk to our doctor then because he was busy, so after feeding, I went back to our apartment to help pack up the car. We assumed discharge would be late afternoon. Around 11 we got a call from our doctor who let us know Talmage wouldn't be discharged. His respiratory rate (how fast he was breathing) was too high and the doctor wanted to do some tests to see why it was so high. We were beyond disappointment. Zane and I sat at the kitchen table with bags packed around us depressed and frustrated. The first week in Miami was a great adventure for the kids but by Saturday evening, they were asking for their own beds. Zane and I were under a lot of stress (Zane especially as he tried to fit in his work, feedings, and be with the family) and of course we wanted our baby home.
Getting Talmage out of the hospital was just step one for us. After that, we had to wait for the state to give us permission to leave. For Gavin (who is from Florida) this took one day but for Lili (Utah) it took 14 days. Our caseworker told us to plan on 7 to 10 business days. Our hope was if discharge was on Monday, then the state would have all week to look at our paperwork. We were hoping they would go quicker to get things done before Easter. With discharge being postponed, we knew we weren't going to be home for Easter.
The doctor started doing tests on Monday to see why Talmage breathed so fast. I kept saying that he has always breathed this fast. I assumed he just was a fast breather and felt like the doctor was being too conservative. On Tuesday the doctor was still not sure what was going on. It was then that I mentioned how Talmage eats. For the past week, he had started having a really hard time eating. At first I thought it was because he wasn't comfortable with me and missed his birthmom (there are a lot of irrational thoughts I have when a baby is first placed with us.) Then the feeding problems started happening more and more. I had pointed it out to the nurses a couple of times asking about reflux, but it was just assumed he was a fussy baby. Talmage never spits up so reflux didn't cross the nurses' minds. The doctor though said it sounded like reflux and ordered a test to be done. By that night, he was on medication for reflux.
I came in the hospital on Wednesday ready to fight for discharge. You don't hospitalize a baby for reflux. Our doctor though wanted to spend the rest of the week watching Talmage to make sure the respiratory rate come down. In all honestly there was no rush for us to leave that day. We were still stuck in Florida because with Good Friday coming up, the state wasn't going to have time to let us leave. I think I was just tired though and so when the doctor told me discharge would tentatively be planned for the next Monday, I was crushed. We were also getting texts from people telling us that they were hoping we were leaving Miami. On the way out of the hospital, I stopped at the Family Center to ask about Easter celebrations at the hospital. When I started talking, tears came out. I know I was being ridiculous. There was a baby next to Talmage getting prepped for a blood transfusion that morning and I was crying about staying a few more days. The lady in charge of the Family Center probably thought my baby was getting ready for brain surgery and kept asking what she could do for me. On my walk home the tears kept coming so that by the time Zane opened the door, I looked a mess. He started panicking thinking something horrible had happened. I finally got out that we needed to unpack. I'm glad my husband is so patient with my emotions!
The kids were going crazy because I hadn't really planned activities that week. It was time to buckle down, buy groceries for the rest of the week, and make plans.
In the end, we didn't do anything too exciting the rest of the week. Talmage's feedings were getting worse and worse and he needed Zane or I there more often. In fact, one nurse commented on how well Talmage ate for me compared to everyone else and that he calmed down faster. That made me feel good! The kids did great though without big outings as long as we went to a park every day. They really handled a difficult situation so well. By the time discharged happened on Monday though, we all celebrated as we left Miami!
The picking up a baby is the hardest part of the adoption for me. We call it the labor of the heart. There are so many parts of our trip we are grateful for though.
-When Talmage was born, he was on 11 medicines. He left the hospital on one.
-We had amazing nurses and doctors working with our baby.
-We were lucky enough to get in the apartments by the hospital that are provided for families. This made our trip affordable! It was so nice to be able to walk to and from the hospital all day instead of driving and fighting traffic all day.
-Our apartment was two bedrooms. We gave up having a queen bed for Zane and I, but we would take the twin beds any day just to have the two bedrooms. It made the bedtime routine for our kids so much easier! Lili (aka the Princess) will not go to sleep with other people in the room. She thinks it is play time.
-Zane and I were grateful for the sectional in the living room. Our hospital twin beds were too noisy in the night. Lili wakes up throughout the night quite a bit and when she heard us roll over, she would start crying. At home, she would just fuss and put herself back to sleep, but because we were in an apartment and worried about waking up the people above us, we would pick her up. Soon Zane and I learned we would get more sleep by sleeping on the sectional and letting the Princess have a room to herself. The leather couch was old and we would wake up with leather pieces stuck to our sheets, but at least we got to sleep through the night!
-I'm grateful our apartment had a little parking lot right outside our door that could act like a backyard. We would do our school work on the grass by it and the boys enjoyed the bugs. Dallin won a remote control Hummer during one of the hospital games and that parking lot and Hummer helped provide a lot of entertainment.
-I'm grateful the neighbor in the next apartment building had a dog that was super friendly to my kids and liked to play fetch.
-We are grateful that if we were stuck in a state, at least it was a place like Florida where there was plenty to do!
-We are so grateful for the Family Center at the hospital. They did our laundry for us, provided entertainment for our kids, helped give my kids a great Easter (more to come on that), and provided Zane a place to work when he needed it.
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