Lili's 2nd Birthday

 I'm having a very rare moment where both babies are asleep and the older boys are at friends' houses. This little blog of mine has been weighing on my mind lately as so many important moments are passing without being documented. First up is Lili's 2nd birthday which was on November 30th.

Becoming a big sister made Lili grow up faster. She is an amazing talker. For awhile she would get a hold of my phone and call people on my favorites list. Everyone kept thinking it was Gavin who was calling because they didn't expect little Lili to have so much to say! Lili also acts older because she likes to be very independent. This is awesome except when she can't do something or I am in a hurry and want to do it for her then we have a great temper tantrum.

Lili's personality is so different from the boys. She brings calmness in our home. Don't misunderstand. I love my boys' energy and passion for life. I also really love how Lili will sit and look at books or begs to be read to all the time. Books are her favorite. She tries to keep up with the boys and is very strong and daring (she can climb anything), but she also has this calmness about her. She loves to please me so she is very obedient. Zane and I can ask her to find her shoes and she goes and does it. It completely shocked me the first couple of times. My boys try to be obedient but along the way to finding shoes there is always something else to distract them from their original goal. Lili is very focused on what she wants and makes sure it happens. At times this also leads to temper tantrums...

I love watching the tender side of Lili come out. She is starting to pay attention to her dolls and if Talmage is crying, she will sit by him to sing him "I'm a Child of God." When we asked once what her baby's name was, meaning her doll, she looked at us and said, "Talmage" meaning she thought Talmage was her baby. Lately she is trying to carry Talmage which means she is trying to lift him by his neck. Since he weighs as much as she does, it is going to be pretty tough to carry him around. Lili is very polite and says thank you all the time. 

Lili also loves singing. At night when she picks her song, I sometimes need her to sing it to me to know what she is saying. I can usually recognize the tune. Her favorite right now is "Master the Tempest is Raging." I taught this song to the kids at church (I teach the singing at church) and she loves it.

Lili is still tiny. She weighs 18 pounds. I don't think she has gained much weight lately. She is just growing taller. Lili is a fantastic eater and will try anything I give her including salads. I think she is the cutest girl ever but I am a little biased. Being the only girl in the family, she has a special place and those brothers of hers sure love her.

Lili wearing the dress my mom made her. Lili loves her grandma and monopolizes her time when she is visiting.

Our next door neighbor got this dress in the mail randomly and gave it to us. It is big on Lili, but it says Happy Birthday on it. Since her birthday was on Sunday this year, it was perfect.

The necklaces were one of her gifts. She loves accessorizing.

She also got books for her birthday. She is really good at these I Spy books.

 Pushing her new shopping cart around.

Showing off her birthday dress.

Lili's not picky about desserts so I went easy this year with a pumpkin cobbler. We had my parents, Zane's mom (she just moved close by us), and my grandma who was visiting for the holidays over for dinner and dessert.

We love our little princess.

It's About Love: Gavin's Special Visit

Gavin spent the next two days visiting his birth family. He loved all the attention. All he could talk about was when we were going to see Tracy next. We played at a park one day and went to a forest for a hike and picnic the next.

Leaf fight with Tracy. 

She was a great sport!

Being silly together

Who wouldn't love all this attention!

My other kids didn't lack for attention of course.

A hike through the forest

 

Gavin and his birth sister Julia

Talmage loved being outdoors and carried

The fall colors were beautiful

We hiked to a stone castle and then when we went to the bottom of it, some of our group tried their hand at rock climbing including Lili.

Being in Tennessee was great. Our road trip home though was another story. We decided to do the 14 hours in one day to avoid the pain of the hotel and the many trips unpacking and repacking the car. Zane would also be able to use his day off helping with the unpacking instead of driving. This plan was tested though when we hit a traffic jam where we went 6 miles in two hours. Talmage and Lili had just fallen asleep right before the traffic jam and then when we stopped rolling, they woke up cranky as can be. Later on that afternoon Dallin did something to get stuck in his seat belt. In trying to get out of it, his seat belt just got tighter and tighter. We pulled over and tried to help him but eventually we decided that we needed to cut him out of it. We drove to the next exit to borrow some scissors from a gas station and cut his seat belt strap. From then on Dallin's and Gavin's seats were touching. This also tested our patience! With all the stops and traffic, we got home at 2:30 a.m. and crashed into bed. Despite the road trip, we had a great little vacation and Gavin felt like the special little boy that he is loved by so many.

A Special Visit for Gavin

 We have an open adoption with Gavin's birthmom Tracy. He saw her when he was one and then because of the births of Lili and Talmage and the month we stayed in the states they came from, we haven't made it to Tennessee to visit again. It was time to fix this and so we braved another road trip (which I swore I wouldn't do after Miami) and made the 14 hour drive to visit. The trip out to Tennessee wasn't to bad. Yes there was some crying from Talmage but at least we didn't have to stop every hour and half to feed for an hour and a half like we did on the way home from Miami. Lili is now forward facing (which I know is not good because she is still so small) so she was entertained by the movies and didn't cry the whole time.  We broke up the trip out there and drove Friday afternoon and all day Saturday.

After a day in the car we decided that the kids would do better at Chuck E Cheese than at a sit down restaurant so this was where Gavin had his reunion with Tracy, her daughter Julia, and her mom Joyce.

A lot of people asked how Gavin did on the trip, was he confused, does he understand who Tracy is and how does he respond to her. My kids understand how adoption works but they don't comprehend yet that our family is unusual. Our family is proof that love binds family more than blood. Kids respond to love and Gavin has a lot of people who love him. He glowed with happiness.

Tracy

Julia

Joyce (grandma) is on the right

Tracy's family was great about loving all my kids. Dallin's birthmom has passed away and we have no contact with Lili's so Tracy is filling in for them.

The next day we went to a park and enjoyed the beautiful fall weather. Gavin posed for tons and tons of pictures. He was a great sport.

Here are some of the group shots.

 Friends of Tracy (the couple in the back) joined us at the park.

Gavin is one lucky boy to have so many people who love him!

More Family Updates

A few more thoughts about life with these crazies...

 Right now Lili loves her Dallin. She says his name very clearly. Sometimes she says his name over and over again just to hear herself saying it. She loves Gavin too, but since they are closer in age, Gavin treats her like any other sibling his age. He sometimes shares and is kind and sometimes tackles her. Dallin though is that much older so he can recognize that Lili is a baby still. He will put her in the swing and push her, help her on the tramp, get her out of her crib when she wakes up etc. She brings out his tender side and she will follow him wherever he goes!

One of our family activities this last month was at the Elementary School carnival. Dallin got to practice his Karate skills again.

This is a bad picture, but both boys are holding their stuffed animals that they adopted at the carnival.

Lili had her first dentist visit. I thought the hygienist was just going to count her teeth, but Lili was doing so well that she cleaned them and everything. I actually laid on the chair and she was on top of me. Sitting on the big chair by herself was too scary. Lili is obsessed with her toothbrush, peppermint and mint flavors, and toothpaste so really this wasn't surprising that she did so well for the dentist. She likes to find other people's toothbrushes and suck on them. I found mine by the front door the other day. Super gross! It is best to keep all the bathroom doors closed with Lili around! She also likes to put toilet paper in the toilet and flush it. She has clogged the toilet before.

Lili and I are already having fights over her hair. She has not caught the vision of braids and beads. Lili thinks it is funny to pull out her hair while she is in her crib waiting to get out or before she falls asleep and suck on it. She likes the taste of her conditioner. I've tried changing her conditioner, but apparently they all taste good. She usually pulls from her left side of her head. In the below pictures you can see the difference between the left side and right side now. If anyone has ideas on how to stop her pulling out her hair, let me know!

Lili hurt her ankle a week and a half before Halloween jumping on the tramp. She stopped walking on her foot that evening and then struggled sleeping all night. By the next morning (at 5 a.m. because neither of us were sleeping anyways), I felt like I should take her in to get a x-ray just in case. This is our first time having to get x-rays for an accident. Pretty good for a family of very active kids. Luckily it was just a sprang though. Lili didn't walk for almost two weeks. It was so sad to see her back to crawling again!

I caught this picture the other day. The three youngest just decided to snuggle together.

Love these sweeties

Family Happenings: Update on Homeschooling

 I'm playing catch up again. It has been hard to keep up with the blog lately. If only I could hook up a computer to my head where I write blog posts all the time while I'm doing mundane tasks. Who knows what brilliant posts would be published? Instead my goal is to keep birth moms/families and extended families up to date and have some kind of journal of our family.

Update on homeschooling:
Dallin was so successful with schooling last year, that I really wanted to do it again this year. He made some great strides and Zane and I felt like he needed at least another year home. I was worried about teaching with two babies but it has gone fine. I wish we could do all our schooling in the morning and be done for the day, but we actually do more schooling in the afternoon when Lili and Talmage are taking a nap. I try to have friends over at least three times a week especially since we aren't doing a sport right now. On Fridays, the boys go to school at a Baptist church with about 300 other home schooled kids. First graders and under are divided in classes where they have science, art, PE, music, story time, Bible study, and recess. Second graders and older pick three electives so next year Dallin could start taking classes like fencing, karate, cooking, and tons of other electives. We love this group. It is a little far away, but it is worth it. Poor Lili and Talmage run errands with me while the boys are there so Fridays are probably their least favorite days.

Home school Field Trip

My favorite parts of home schooling:
I feel like with home schooling I have more time to teach the kids skills beyond just math and reading. The kids help out with a lot of the chores. Dallin is getting really good at doing dishes and vacuuming. Gavin is in charge of the dishwasher. When Dallin wants to earn extra money, he cleans the bathroom. I wish he wanted the extra money every week! I'm working on helping my boys become independent at their morning routine (making bed, getting dressed etc) with a chart system. With two boys who are distracted very easily, this can be difficult. It is hard to remember more than one instruction at a time! We also work on social skills. Right now we are doing What to Do When Your Temper Flares and it is a great resource!

Dallin is doing piano lessons as part of his curriculum. I tried him out at a piano teacher and it didn't work out. It is hard to get Dallin to sit on a piano bench. At home though, I can handle it and Dallin is doing awesome. He loves playing the piano and will play for everyone who comes to our house. Dallin thinks that schooling means Reading, Math, Science, Writing, and Piano. It is just another subject. We are still using Music Mind Games a lot and sometimes Gavin joins in for those.

I like that I could find a math curriculum that fits my boys. We play a lot of math games and do less worksheets. It has been very interesting to see Dallin come home from his Friday classes with the papers in his backpack. I ask him why something wasn't finished or why he wrote like he did, and he just says he told his teacher he would do it later. A lot of times people don't know how much to push Dallin or what you can really expect from him. I can push him and I do. I can do this because it is one on one.

Lastly, I love how close my kids are and how much they play together. Dallin and Gavin have time for jumping on the tramp, playing legos, imaginary games etc in their day.

Homeschooling can be super hard on me. I never have enough time to teach them everything I want to, and change 12 diapers a day, and stay on top of dishes, and make dinner, and clean etc. If you want to visit, warn me ahead of time so I can at least wipe down the bathrooms! You will also find toys and messes all over the house and laundry all over my room. We have four kids here full time playing hard.

About a month before school started, a few friends started talking about a Joy School for Gavin's age. I debated joining, but then I realized I would be frustrated. I like to be in charge of what and how subjects are being taught. I also have a whole room full of great school supplies so it is just as easy for me to teach in my home. I was also feeling guilty because since I started home schooling, I didn't teach preschool in my home for Gavin and his friends. He sat on the sidelines through all of Dallin's years and was now missing out. After much discussion with Zane, I decided to start teaching preschool again but only once a week. Every Monday three of Gavin's friends come over for school and Lili joins in on the fun. I'm constantly telling Zane how amazing Lili is at school. She can sit on a carpet square for longer than a minute...this is so unusual for my family. It blows my mind! Dallin gets paid to be my helper at preschool. He does a great job and for the most part, takes his job very seriously. Sometimes he is the teacher's helper and sometimes he is helping with the babies. He is always in charge of our recess/PE time and gets those kids moving!  Gavin loves having his friends over every week. During the rest of the week, I teach him his preschool lessons while I'm teaching Dallin. I will teach one boy a subject while the other is playing in the toy room and then they switch. Sometimes during their break, they play educational games on the I Pad. 

My Super Hero

This kid wears a lot of costumes during the day!