Why Aren't You Holding Me???

I can see you mom and yet you are not holding me! WHY IS THAT?

Despite what Zane thinks, Gavin is a mommy's boy. He is happy to play by himself as long as I'm near or as long as he can't see me. He has a hard time letting others hold him if I'm right there. Oh how I wish I had just sat down on the couch next to my grandparents and held Gavin while Zane took the picture. This was the first time Gavin met his great grandparents and his first picture with them. Again, I wish I had just been in the picture holding Gavin next to my grandma!

Despite what the picture looks like, we had a great visit with my grandparents.

Another regret- I didn't get a picture of my boys with my other grandma. Ahhh!

Playing with a Wonderful Friend

We spent a morning with one of my bestest friends Lori (friends from high school, college roommates, and newlywed friends) and her cute kids at a really fun park. This park has little streams for the kids to race boats down and to just wade. There were places to run around, climb, and explore. It was a great way to spend a morning!

Lagoon Day

The first day in Utah, we met up with parts of Zane's family and headed to Lagoon. This was Dallin's first time on a roller coaster and he liked most of them. In every picture we took of him on rides, his head was facing the wrong direction. Maybe he was embarrassed that I was taking so many pictures of him and waving to him like a maniac! I mean, he was with his cool friends so maybe mommy isn't the most important person in his life... (sniff, sniff)

Dallin has met his cousins, but he didn't remember them. Everywhere we went, he was pleasantly surprised that there were more "friends" (as he calls them) to play with. Dallin especially enjoyed waking up every morning having slept in the same room as his friends!

Dallin is with his cousins Brigg, Brayden, and Eli. By the end of the week, we heard Dallin telling Brayden (the cousin his age) that he was his best friend.

Getting ready to ride the dinosaur egg ride.

Afterward- Not his favorite

We went on a lot more rides and did the water park. I didn't think we would stay as long as we did because Gavin doesn't enjoy sitting in a stroller all day long. I realized later in the afternoon the reason why Gavin was so content to stay in the stroller was because he had a fever. By the time we got back to where we were staying and checked his temperature, it had risen to 102.7 under the arm. For the next three days Gavin acted fine as long as he was on ibprophen, but when it wore off, his temperature spiked back up again to 102.7. Being out of town with a sick baby is hard. My doctor's office got plenty of calls from me as I worried about what could be causing his temperature. In the end it was just a virus. I think Gavin doesn't like leaving home because when we went to visit his birthmom, who lives in another state, he got sick too. Both trips Gavin liked to wake us up a lot at night reminding us that he wishes he was in his own crib where he could get better!

Airplanes

I was not looking forward to the plane rides for our vacation in Utah. Traveling with a one-year-old is not my kind of relaxing vacation. Having a four hour lay over and a flight that leaves at 8 a.m. is also not high on my list (we flew with frequent flier miles, so we got the flights that were available). Going through security twice because the airport where we had our layover has a lame layout where guests have to leave the airport to get to another terminal which means going through security again. Going through security with two kids, a stroller, tons of carry-ons to avoid charges, and baby food isn't fun the first time. The second time wasn't any better.

I was expecting a nightmare. Actually though, besides the two securities, the flights to and from Utah went really well. Gavin fell asleep on both our flights to Utah and on the way home. He didn't sleep the whole time, but enough so that we could handle the crawling around from lap to lap and trying to climb over the chairs to get to the people behind us. Dallin watched a movie on the first flight, fell asleep on the second, and was asleep on our return flight before the plane had left the runway. He woke up for the last 15 minutes of that flight.

During the layover, we let both boys run around in an emptier part of the airport, ate lunch and then pulled out the cars. The last hour of it, both Zane and I were getting pretty tired of entertaining (we had been up since 5:30 a.m.), but then an angel sent straight from heaven in the form of a little girl Dallin's age, saved us. Dallin and this girl became best friends and played for an hour with cars while Gavin trailed behind them. Zane and I got to relax for a little.



All and all, the flights were great and way better than driving!

The End of an Era

We knew this day would come. Honestly, I thought it would last five years at the most, so we should count our blessings that we got an extra year and a half together.

Yesterday, Jared and Kari moved away from us. They didn't just move to another city, they got on a plane and moved to another country to start a new adventure. I am excited for them. Honestly. But I have also shed many tears this last week.

Growing up I never imagined I would live so close to so many of my siblings. I especially never thought three of us would all be in the same ward together. It all started 6 1/2 year ago when Zane graduated from college and we moved back to where I grew up. Zane had landed a wonderful job and we were starting our grownup life together with college behind us. We moved at Christmas time and found a house in January of 2005. We actually were deciding on two houses and over Christmas break Jared announced they were pregnant and were leaving downtown to buy a house. They looked at our second choice house and were sold on it (I think Kari made Jared look at a few other houses but he was probably just going through the emotions of it.) We moved in on the same day a street apart from each other. Jared and Zane immediately started their busy season, and Kari and I were left to the unpacking and the loneliness of being without a husband. We relied on each other to help put up pictures, someone to talk to, and eventually someone to eat dinner with. I just hated cooking for just myself (the boys eat at work during busy season), and so we started our rotation of eating at each other's houses. Kari and I became fast friends.

I have always felt like I needed Kari more than she needed me. She is a great listener and I love to talk. I would say that within a few months she became one of my best friends, someone I could always turn to whenever I needed something.

I hope she got something out of the relationship too. She and Jared got free babysitting quite a bit before we got Dallin. They had the perfect situation, the aunt and uncle living down the street with no children who loved spending time with their nephew. There again though, I probably benefited more. I wanted so desperately to have children and she shared her son with me. When the girls at church talked about being mothers, I had nothing to say, so I would tell Drew stories. She never cared. Kari's recovery after having Drew was very difficult for quite awhile and she needed a lot of help. I remember taking him for a walk to my house one afternoon after work and realizing how much I loved my nephew. It was at that moment that I first felt like I could adopt. Zane and I were so focused on getting me pregnant, that we hadn't thought much about adoption. We never thought that would be our path. I realized at that moment that maybe it would be our path and that I could definitely love a baby that wasn't born to me.

Kari was a huge help during the infertility years. She helped give me shots, encouraged and celebrated with me as I learned to give myself my shots, and was a fantastic listener when I needed someone. I have been so grateful over and over again that Jared married a nurse!

Just like the story of Ruth and Naomi from the Bible, I have followed Kari throughout our service in the church. She would be asked to serve in the young women's program, a year or two later, I would be asked to help too. When she was asked to serve in the Relief Society (women’s organization), I followed a year later. We did girl's camp together, meetings, visits, and there was a moment during one horrible young women’s lesson about mothers (ok, it was probably a great lesson, but at that moment, it was too much for me to bear when I needed a shoulder to cry on desperately. I held it in until most of the YW had left, but I knew I couldn't hold it in any longer as I searched for Zane so I ran over to Kari, put my head on her shoulder, and bawled. She hugged me, cared about me, and let me bawl. Kari is never judgmental and always knowing what to say.

I remember specifically telling Jared and Kari that a birthmom picked us to adopt Dallin. I remember it because of their reaction. They were so excited for us. The night we brought him home, I can't remember who was there first to celebrate with us Kari or Haley. Kari has acted like a sister for so long now.

We have shared a lot of things over the years. In the beginning, Jared didn't have a lawn mower and we didn't have...(we can't remember because we didn't use his for very long) so we traded and shared. You can imagine a Saturday morning one of us pushing the lawn mower down the street to each other's house so we could share it. I'm sure we impressed the neighbors. We didn't have satellite TV for a long time, so we would go to Jared's to watch Conference, Lost, So You Think You Can Dance and other shows that didn't come in very clearly on our TV.

Kari and I continued trading cooking off and on over the years even when our husbands weren't working late so that we didn't have to cook as much. Kari and I got a little girl time in and Jared and Zane got a little sport time in. Four years ago Haley moved out by us. She eventually started cooking with us and we started our three time a week rotation. We didn't always stay and eat as our families grew and life got more hectic, but we all saw each other and talked together almost every day.

I haven't talked much about my brother Jared. I will miss him too but he knows all that and saying it makes him conceited. Besides, he didn't even get a little emotional saying goodbye and even looked at me like I was a little silly. I will miss our talks, our banter back in forth, and his hugs that are far and few in between, but are great when I really need one.

As I walked around their empty house, I realized I was sad for changes that are happening because I know things will never be the same again. Even without Jared leaving, changes were coming. Our dinners were going to end eventually because it was getting too hectic, and both Haley and I have been talking about moving to bigger homes as we are getting squished out of ours. When Kari and Jared come back in two years, who knows where we will all be. It was good while it lasted and I love and miss my neighbors already.

On the upside, my little brother is moving about four hours from us and he too is a nurse. I haven't forgotten that when Kari left the country a month ago to find a house, Gavin landed himself in the ER. At least I will have my little brother although his knowledge on pediatrics needs to pick up! I might just have to Facetime Kari with my questions and hope I don't catch her in the middle of the night!

Sam taking the boys down!

Gavin with his best friend Alex. When they see each other, they get soooo excited! It is stickin cute.

At the zoo together. I'm not sure what Dallin is doing, but Drew and Sam know how to pose!

A Conversation with a Wise Dallin

Dallin: Why are you crying?
Me: It has finally hit me that Jared and Kari are leaving and mommy is going to miss them.
Dallin (pausing for a little bit): Well, Matt, Haley, and Caleb will still be here.
Me: That's true. What if we move far away?
Dallin: Then a lot of people will cry for us.
Me: You're right.
Dallin: Mom, you're a princess because you are crying.

See, so wise and very sweet.

So Loved

Zane is getting older, is losing hair, and when he plays sports like he is 20, he feels it the rest of the day. I have also never loved him more (because honestly as Zane always says, "bald man are sexy) and there is not a dad more loved than him.

Happy Birthday sweetie!

Remember Goliad!

Instead of heading straight home from our vacation, we decided to do a little site seeing. Zane had left early that morning with my little brother and his wife Clayton and Kara to take them to the airport and to go to work. Other members of my family had left the night before because of work, so our little site seeing trip was just my parents, Haley's family, and mine.


We have been to the Alamo many times and San Jacinto, so it was only fitting that we visit Presidio La Bahia in Goliad. In the final battle of the Texas Revolution, the battle cry at San Jacinto was "Remember the Alamo! Remember Goliad!" In August 1835, the Texans had taken Presidio La Bahia in a small skirmish. Later in March 1836, Fannin's man were attacked by the Mexican army in the field near the Presidio. (The Battle of the Alamo ended at the beginning of March in 1836). The Texans were outnumbered and defeat was imminent. Colonel Fannin and his men surrendered thinking they would be held prisoner then released to the United States. Santa Anna had different plans and 303 Texans were marched out and shot point blank. The survivors of the execution were knifed and clubbed to death. 39 more men were killed in the fort. Colonel Fannin was the last to die after watching all his men executed. The bodies were burned and left in the open for vultures and coyotes to get.

We also learned about the Angel of Goliad, Francita Alavez, who spoke up for prisoners for more humane treatment and help save 20 prisoners. I love learning about brave women who risk their own life in the name of humanity and freedom. There is a statue of Fancita Alavez to honor her. I failed to take of it though.

I'm glad we stopped by and learned more about our Texas history despite the heat!

Vacationing at the Lazy L Ranch

My favorite type of vacation:

Great Company: vacationing with my family (everyone came but my little sister Lindsey who was honeymooning with her new husband Derrick. We are glad they chose not to honeymoon with us!)
Relaxing: With extra people around and cousins for the boys to play with, the parents actually got to relax a little. I even picked up a book for the first time in forever.
Playing games: Ticket to Ride and Dominion were the two favorites. We love to play late into the night.
Great Conversation: I love being able to relax and catch up late into the night.

The Lazy L Ranch offered it all. We went swimming twice a day, the big cousins loved playing constantly or watching movies together, and the adults enjoyed playing games. The little cousins (Gavin has two cousins all born within 5 months of each other) loved the adventure of crawling around a new place and causing mischief.

The only downfall to vacation is sleeping. We had a couple of rough nights of boys waking us up during the night, but we also caught some naps during the day.

Swimming with everyone (Gavin was taking a nap)

Dallin loved playing with Caleb's snakes. There seemed to be a lot of toy snakes laying around the house. I seemed to find all of them during the middle of the night which led to a couple of screams.

On a side note, before we left, my friend mentioned that I'm always prepared which is why it takes me so long to pack. We packed quickly for this trip because my sister got married on Saturday and we left Sunday after church for our trip. On the way out I grabbed the Clorox wipes and infant ibuprofen which both came in handy multiple times. I wished I remembered to grab my pants and one more pair of clothes for Dallin. I packed clothes from the folded laundry, but forgot to go into Dallin's and my closet to grab the rest. Needless to say I wore my exercise clothes every day which was fine because we didn't exercise at all. Dallin kept his clothes pretty clean, so he wore an outfit twice.

We had a great trip and I'm glad we fit it in. I think it was rough on my mom who helped plan girl's camp this summer, the Youth Conference trip to Nauvoo (I think she really planned this mostly on her own), and a daughter's wedding. She did get to relax a little and we all enjoyed spending time with my little brother and his wife who were visiting from Utah. It was also great to have one last vacation with Jared and Kari who are taking off on an adventure overseas for two years.